All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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