Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
