Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
