It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
