we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
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