I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
The feeling are messing with the penis
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
