i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
