Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Randomize
