Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
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