he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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