Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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