There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
