so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
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