you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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