I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
