Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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