Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
