called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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