Joe is yelling at the trees again.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
