Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
