Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
i dont even know how to be here
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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