3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
