Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
