Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
God I need to hump something, right now.
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