This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
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