it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
