He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
