He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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