What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
