either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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