Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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