nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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