ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
okay pat passed out under dana's car
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
