What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
