I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
