Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
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