I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
