Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
so let's talk penis.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
