so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
