Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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