OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
