I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Girls should come with a carfax report
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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