She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
