So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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