I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
