i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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