i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
