So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
you told grandpa to call you daddy
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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