it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Randomize