Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
