how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize